That would be rather orb-like of them, wouldn't it? After everything we've been through and all of the orbs we've come across so far ... it sounds rather like their brand of chaos.
[ Yes. And he's seen this kind of predator-meets-prey in his adventures as well — not quite in the same way, and usually with a little more fight from the prey's side ... but under the orbs power, it's hard not to feel so helpless.
Their very nature is to feed off of the turmoil and chaos and desperation that those they do deals with so often provide because the power they possess is supposedly unparalleled. The Doctor still isn't sure whether he believes they can undo their regrets, but he isn't without his own desperate hope either.
And so it begs another question, one he already knows the answer to but it's still worth asking. ]
I can place every bet they hardly give a shit about if any of us do get what we asked for. Long as they're dipping the scales one way or another, that's all they want.
[ kovacs is definitely not stupid enough to believe there's any good will from these offers, and considering that no one on the station itself has actually managed to successfully gain their deal, no one aside from the people they've taken the orbs from who lost more than they gained from the chaos that ensued on their respective planets, he might even have his doubts that any of this will actually result in something good coming out of it.
still, there's the chance, along with the fact that his being here is about more than why he came in the first place. there's too many people to look out for here for him to just walk out now.
the next question leaves him quiet for a second, exhaling a soft breath through his nose. ]
[ The Doctor nods as though satisfied with the answer, or because he can relate to some promise made, something so absolute that it binds with ones soul and no matter how much it might cost, it couldn't have gone any other way.
He doesn't ask for any more detail than that, not because he isn't almost comically curious to know just what it is Kovacs decided to ask for, but because it isn't his place. Some things can be badgered out of a person, some things just aren't as serious. But this ... well. This is.
He's old, he's seen so much, he can understand the nuance of that more than most. ]
[ it's the asking of that particular question that makes me realize he isn't entirely sure what actually brought him here in the first place, whether it was just telling the doctor about his situation or if there was something more he was looking for.
his eyes drift both with the allowance of that pensive thought and an excuse to look away like hs doesn't want to be realized for not actually having that in mind.
and then it comes to him. why it matters that he told the doctor above all else. ]
I need you ... to make sure I don't steer too far.
[ he turns his eyes back, slightly somber in his stare. ]
There was a time in my life, I did things blindly — made some dark choices. I'm not saying I'm a good man now, some things just stick with you. But I ... I at least like to think I can look out for some people. Make the right choices to keep them safe. Problem is, once I start losing more memories, I don't know how much I might stray from that. How I might ... dip back into being the guy who didn't know what path he was on. When that happens, I need you to set me right. Make sure I don't become someone that hurts the people I care about.
[ (Delicate) eyebrows lift ever-so-slightly when Kovacs begins to speak, and he watches him shift his gaze before their eyes meet.
It's certainly a lot to ask for, but the Doctor feels more honoured than anything. He understands what's being asked and why it means so much; of course he does, who better to understand a life of dark choices being made and the need to remember them all than a 2,000 year old alien with a shadowed past like him? To remember what makes a good man and what makes someone otherwise, and why he needs so many rules? He's never had anyone to steer him straight, and perhaps it's why he's always been as careful as he can be. (And why sometimes he isn't at all.)
He doesn't even have to say all that much, because the few words he picks say enough. They mean enough. The Doctor doesn't make promises lightly, and he'll always, always keep them once they're made.
He reaches out to cover one of Kovacs' hands with one of his, squeezing gently. Reassuringly, perhaps. ]
[ it isn't something he'd say to just anybody, and even here it feels like a lot to ask, but kovacs knows this is the right person to trust with this, someone who'd make the most sensible decision in trying times, someone who's lived well over a thousand years in making tough choices.
if he strays or if he becomes a liability, he can trust that the doctor can either set him right. or keep him from being a danger to everyone else. whichever comes first.
kovacs isn't the type to ask much of anyone, not for help, but he exhales deeply through his nose when the doctor squeezes his hand, giving a slow nod. ]
Thank you.
[ it's about all else he could say, enough carried in those words, before his other hand joins to squeeze the doctor's in turn. ]
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[ Yes. And he's seen this kind of predator-meets-prey in his adventures as well — not quite in the same way, and usually with a little more fight from the prey's side ... but under the orbs power, it's hard not to feel so helpless.
Their very nature is to feed off of the turmoil and chaos and desperation that those they do deals with so often provide because the power they possess is supposedly unparalleled. The Doctor still isn't sure whether he believes they can undo their regrets, but he isn't without his own desperate hope either.
And so it begs another question, one he already knows the answer to but it's still worth asking. ]
Was this revised arrangement worth it?
no subject
[ kovacs is definitely not stupid enough to believe there's any good will from these offers, and considering that no one on the station itself has actually managed to successfully gain their deal, no one aside from the people they've taken the orbs from who lost more than they gained from the chaos that ensued on their respective planets, he might even have his doubts that any of this will actually result in something good coming out of it.
still, there's the chance, along with the fact that his being here is about more than why he came in the first place. there's too many people to look out for here for him to just walk out now.
the next question leaves him quiet for a second, exhaling a soft breath through his nose. ]
It's worth it. I can promise that much.
no subject
He doesn't ask for any more detail than that, not because he isn't almost comically curious to know just what it is Kovacs decided to ask for, but because it isn't his place. Some things can be badgered out of a person, some things just aren't as serious. But this ... well. This is.
He's old, he's seen so much, he can understand the nuance of that more than most. ]
So, then, Kovacs. How can I help?
no subject
his eyes drift both with the allowance of that pensive thought and an excuse to look away like hs doesn't want to be realized for not actually having that in mind.
and then it comes to him. why it matters that he told the doctor above all else. ]
I need you ... to make sure I don't steer too far.
[ he turns his eyes back, slightly somber in his stare. ]
There was a time in my life, I did things blindly — made some dark choices. I'm not saying I'm a good man now, some things just stick with you. But I ... I at least like to think I can look out for some people. Make the right choices to keep them safe. Problem is, once I start losing more memories, I don't know how much I might stray from that. How I might ... dip back into being the guy who didn't know what path he was on. When that happens, I need you to set me right. Make sure I don't become someone that hurts the people I care about.
no subject
It's certainly a lot to ask for, but the Doctor feels more honoured than anything. He understands what's being asked and why it means so much; of course he does, who better to understand a life of dark choices being made and the need to remember them all than a 2,000 year old alien with a shadowed past like him? To remember what makes a good man and what makes someone otherwise, and why he needs so many rules? He's never had anyone to steer him straight, and perhaps it's why he's always been as careful as he can be. (And why sometimes he isn't at all.)
He doesn't even have to say all that much, because the few words he picks say enough. They mean enough. The Doctor doesn't make promises lightly, and he'll always, always keep them once they're made.
He reaches out to cover one of Kovacs' hands with one of his, squeezing gently. Reassuringly, perhaps. ]
Well then. My friend, you have my word.
[ Trust him, he says. He's the Doctor. ]
no subject
if he strays or if he becomes a liability, he can trust that the doctor can either set him right. or keep him from being a danger to everyone else. whichever comes first.
kovacs isn't the type to ask much of anyone, not for help, but he exhales deeply through his nose when the doctor squeezes his hand, giving a slow nod. ]
Thank you.
[ it's about all else he could say, enough carried in those words, before his other hand joins to squeeze the doctor's in turn. ]