[She spins about, face lit up with a smile upon hearing him there. But then it dawns on her that he's standing there, looking at her. And she's certainly not completely naked, but she's more exposed right now than she ever has been in front of him before.
No, she definitely didn't think this one through.
But she can't turn back now. Brave heart, Clara. Move forward, one foot in front of the other. Her smile doesn't fade in warmth but does become a little self-conscious as she gives a light shake of her head.]
No. You're fine, Doctor.
[She can insist on that much at least. Even if she is becoming very aware of the fact her heart is already beating faster and this is definitely a situation that can become very not okay in a blink of an eye.]
The corset's on the bed. If you don't mind grabbing it?
[ The Doctor swallows, feeling slowly returning to his legs, finally presenting the opportunity to — you know, move. And move he does, across the room and towards the bed in question, to retrieve the corset. ]
It's certainly a bit more complicated than I anticipated.
[ What with all the strips of bone and the lacing and all the little button holes. And the Doctor is a clever man, make no mistake, but he suddenly feels as though he's a little out of his element. Not that he won't give this the ol' college try, as they say. Aside from clever, the Doctor is also impossibly stubborn, and his ego added to the mix means he simply won't admit defeat.
He clears his throat as he comes back over to where Clara is, gesturing towards the standing mirror. ]
[She rapid fires off the question about whether everything is under control the second he's finished speaking. It's not that she doesn't trust him to do this, because she wouldn't have insisted on him doing it if she didn't. It's that she is acutely aware of how close to toeing the line this is. If she was showing any little bit more, the line he had drawn in the sand would be completely blurred.
And maybe on some levels, that line has already started to be blurred. The kiss in their shared dreams and that kiss beneath the mistletoe...
Well.
She already has goosebumps, and they're only standing beside one another in front of the mirror. So yeah, maybe a little tease will help make her feel more in control of the situation.]
[ Please. As though the Doctor would ever admit to the situation being anything other than fully under control. Even when he's got the corset in both hands, flipping it one way or another before he finally determines the 'right' side, he's still very sure that everything is perfectly under control. ]
So I think that this side here — well, it'll have to go around you, eh? Like — [ Oh, he'll just have to step up and do it, right? He moves to stand behind her, guiding one end of the corset over her chest so by the end of it, he's got his arms around her. And it's completely normal, this level of closeness; they've ... been close before, after all, hugs and linked hands are an almost daily occurrence, this really shouldn't be strange.
He swallows. ] There. If you could hold that in place, I could figure out the back bit.
[she starts by biting the inside of her cheek, to give her something to focus on other than the fact that he's so close. Her breath catches when his arms go around her, and she holds it until he asks her to keep hold of the corset so it stays in place. There's a soft, shaky exhale as she obliges, hands firmly pressing against the corset.]
If you can tightly tie a shoe, you can lace a corset. At least, that's what Jane always has told me.
[The words are a distraction for the both of them, idle chatter meant to try and break through the mounting tension. It's a bit of a funny thing to her, that they can hug and hold hands and stay pressed close every day. But this definitely has a different feeling to it than all that. And it's not unwelcome at all.]
Well, lucky for you I've tied many a shoe in my day then. Sometimes two sets at once, and don't ask me how I managed that, I can barely remember it myself except that it was something about a competition — but it was a very clear triumph.
[ Very, you know, under control. Because that is apparently the theme that they're going with today, and the Doctor is going to concentrate on that to keep from thinking of other things and getting all into his own head about it (things that are not quite unlike what Clara might be considering, herself), which only leads to flapping his hands and rushing out of the room in a flurry of limbs.
The chatter helps, though.
While she secures the front part of her corset, the Doctor is occupied with the lacing itself from behind. And his hands are perhaps surprisingly-unsurprisingly deft with the ribbon and the series of eyelets, each slide of the lead finding its appropriate place until a criss-crossing pattern starts to fasten the whole piece together. ]
Ah. [ Try as he might however, looking at the whole thing in a practical manner isn't as effective as it usually is. He's close enough that he can smell the clean scent of her shampoo, and feel the heat radiating off of her bare skin — surely just a side effect of the blistering temperatures here, though. Yes. Anyway — ] How does it feel? All right? Too tight? Not tight enough?
[She's incredibly grateful for the idle chatter, along with the fact her fingers have to work to secure the clasps on the front of the corset. He starts to lace her in and she sucks in a breath, realizing a moment too late that she shouldn't have done that. That breath is released as she's keenly aware of his being pressed in close, causing the hair on the back of her neck to stand on end. Goosebumps rise up after, and she bites at her lip to hold in a sigh that's threatening to make its way out.]
It's tight, but it could be tighter.
[Done securing the front of the corset, she glances up into the mirror to watch their reflection. There's something about the look of him pressed in close behind her, seeing her in this state of undress, helping her with something innocently intimate that makes her blush.
She's aware of each and every movement of his hand, and swears she can feel his breath warm on the back of her neck. Her each and every little movement is calculated to not suggest attraction, to keep this as calm as possible. Her eyes are wide as she watches him work through the reflection, the softest sigh escaping her whenever he obliges with her request.]
[ The Doctor has to get in j u s t a smidge closer to find the correct anchorage of force, tugging at the ribbon with a little more strength. The corset wrapped around her chest pulls in just a little tighter under his hands, and he pauses there. ]
Better?
[ Yes. At this point, it's undeniable, the way he can feel each breath she inhales and releases, straining against the fabric meant to keep her figure rather set. He, too, looks over at their reflections in the mirror — just for a second — but it's a second long enough to have him meeting her eyes, and then immediately feeling ridiculous, and looking away. Almost — shy.
Corsets are funny things though, aren't they, something he doesn't think he'll ever understand, but there is perhaps some ... sort of appeal to it. Aesthetically speaking, that is.
Right. ]
After all, you're going to want to be able to breathe with it on.
[Their eyes meet in their reflection, and her blush only deepens as he looks away. Her eyes avert downward and she realizes that he's not the only one feeling shy. Which is ridiculous, really. When is she ever shy? She's usually the one flustering him. And it's not like he's intentionally doing anything to make her blush.
It's maddening.]
You make everything better.
[She answers his question, giving a nod of her head. There's a test of her breathing, slow and steady breaths. It's tight, but not impossible to breathe in. There isn't any thought given to the fact her words hold a memory for her, one that he likely hasn't experienced yet. Of course there's another layer of meaning to them, and he couldn't possibly know how much she needs and appreciates his focusing on her for this mission.
He makes everything better without even trying. Whether it's fixing her corset or making her heart feel full when she otherwise feels like she's sinking into darkness. He's always there for her.]
[ Perhaps they're the perfect words to say, either because they're so very Clara or because it gives the Doctor an excuse to put on some silly air. Either way, the Doctor's smile in response dispels any of his own feelings of discomfort, looking purposefully in her direction now. He finishes the last of the lacing, tying the two ends into a perfect bow. ]
Well. [ It's said softly, lightly. (So much for silly, then.) ] That's what I do.
[ He pats the bow as though to give it his final blessing, then reaches up to squeeze her arm gently. ]
[Her hand reaches up to press against his, smiling at the sight of them in the mirror. It's good for her to have moments like this one, where she realizes that no matter what sort of person she thinks she's become, he still is here for her. That must mean he still sees the good in her, that he isn't afraid of the person she's become.
Any issues there might have been with their varying timelines don't seem to be so pressing now. They've come together over the course of the months here where things are different than they were in her timeline, when they only traveled together on Wednesdays and whenever she gave him permission to come get her. here they have to go through time the long way, each day spent together more and more time to deepen their bond.
Things feel different now than they had before his regeneration on Trenzalore. But the trick is figuring out what to do with that feeling.]
Seems like.
[She offers their reflection one more glance before she turns to face him, still remaining firmly planted in his orbit. There isn't any hurry to move away and slip a dress on. She's happy right where she's at, just for a bit longer.
Her eyes glance up to his face, and she's reminded very much of that kiss they shared beneath the mistletoe as she studies him closely. That doesn't do anything but make the blush spread across the rest of her body, making her flushed and painfully shy for the first time in forever.]
Will you be here tonight?
[He has a habit of wandering and doing his own thing, but she hopes he'll find his way back here to her.]
Well, I had been thinking of making a trip up to the mines after everyone's left them and gone to bed. Thought I'd do a little bit of investigating, you know. Or there's seeing the stables again, but —
[ The Doctor is, as he has a penchant to do, rambling yet again. It isn't quite the nerves this time, but then there's the way she's looking up at him now, eyes practically boring into hers. And no, he doesn't look away either, the whole room around them floating away.
He clears his throat, properly seeing her, and touches her cheek. It's light and could be construed as playful even — in certain circumstances. But his expression softens and he shakes his head. ]
But I can be here tonight if you'd like. Suppose it's a husband's duty, eh? [ He smiles then, with the barest glint of mischief. ] Plenty we could explore later anyway.
[His touch to her cheek is electric. Goosebumps rise up over her arms as he does, and even though the touch is likely just meant to be a silly playful thing, her cheek leans right into it as if she's seeking out firmer contact.
Typically this would be where she attempts to fluster him by saying something ridiculous like There's plenty we can explore here in bed too. But things have shifted between them to not feel like she needs to do that. Not when she's feeling a bit of hope, happiness warming her heart until she's unable to keep the joy off her face.]
We can head to the mines tomorrow night. Just the two of us.
[But tonight he's hers, and she has every intention of filling the time with whispered conversation and laughter beneath the blankets in bed. Her hand reaches up, fingers curling around his wrist. Her thumb softly works along his pulse point, feeling his double heartbeat. Is this closeness effecting him as much as it is her?]
[ Not that whatever it is she's got planned for them tonight might be any less fun. It'll be a different sort of fun. And it is. Different, that is. Something's ... shifted. It doesn't feel awful; it's actually really rather the opposite, and it's got him feeling just a bit nervous, but a bit excited, but mostly he's trying not to think of it at all. He doesn't want to think about that horrid conversation they'd had some months ago, and the way he'd put that look of disappointment into her expression. He doesn't want to think of how afraid he'd been that he'd gone and wrecked their whole friendship, that he'd hurt her and driven her away from him ... even if that couldn't really be possible knowing what little he knows of his future self.
And he doesn't want to think of how selfish he's being right now, or how much more selfish he can be if he lets himself. Which, really, is good because the Doctor takes pride in being rather practiced in the art of distraction.
Even when Clara's pressing her thumb against his pulse, which is only serving to make his hearts beat just a tick faster.
[Ah, his heart is beating a bit faster now. That...well, that's good, isn't it? It means he must be feeling something. She stares up at him for a few moments later, their eyes staying connected the entire time. But she's the one that eventually looks and pulls away, going to retrieve her new dress. They have roles to play here, and she's determined to perform hers flawlessly.
It's hours and hours later that night, after he's back from his exploring and she's exhausted after her first long shift downstairs in the saloon. He's helped her remove her dress and corset, and they've found their way dressed down and in bed. They're caught staring at one another again, only this time they're beneath the covers in the small bed, curled up on their sides. They've pulled them up over their heads and are using a scrap of wood that she's carved to have the charter symbol for light magic that Sabriel taught her. It's resting on the bed between them, allowing them to see one another. They've just previously been discussing her studying magic and the conversation's fallen to the wayside, leaving them silently looking at one another. She doesn't even realize they've also been holding hands until she feels the brush of his thumb against her finger, causing her fingers to curl further inward against his.
Slowly, the corners of her mouth tug upward into a smile. These moments with shared whispers and longing looks mean a great deal to her. More than he likely will ever know. ]
Do you remember your anti-gravity motorbike? I wish we had one here with us. Can you imagine the look on everyone's faces as we raced up the side of the mountain?
[She giggles, smile turning into more of an amused smirk. But she never looks away. Not even when she knows she really should. But it's not as if he's looking away either. So there's no harm in this, in soft words spoken and hands being held. It's just the way things are between them now.]
Oh, that'd be brilliant. Wish I did have my anti-grav motorbike, though I suppose the kick-up of dust wouldn't change, and we'd still be walking around in our dusty clothing all day.
[ And said dusty heap of clothing is now not-so-carefully draped across the backs of chairs and on top of dressers, and stuffed into drawers.
All in all, the evening is turning out to be a delightful one, even without the usual hustle and bustle of an adventure or a life-threatening invasion, or something trying to chase them or eat them or end the entire cosmos. He wonders if this is what a normal human life is like, all those bits he'd been too impatient to stick around for, when he'd kick up a fuss and huffily make his way back into the TARDIS for a kip to some different era in a different galaxy, just because he could.
It's the sort of calmness that they haven't really had the time for even on the station, where things always felt a little more ... cramped. Closely tucked in with their fellow crewmates, there was always the chance that someone would need something, or someone would run into someone else, and three very dangerous glowing orbs were housed in the wing the next hall over.
He's still holding her hand in his, thumb gently sketching light haphazard circles over her skin as he thinks about all the other things that might be out of place in a world like this one. ]
[She isn't expecting the mention of a giraffe. Though with the Doctor, she supposes she really should always expect the unexpected. Her nose wrinkles up as she laughs softly, giving a light shake of her head. ]
Probably for the best. I don't think giraffes would do well with all the sand.
[Not that she does much better. It feels like they're always covered in a thin layer of dirt and sand, and no amount of cleaning she does helps keep it tame. Not that it matters much, since this isn't really their home. But it's been easy for her to get lost in the idea of being his wife, of playing the part. Of living together like this, something sweet and quiet and absolutely perfect.
Her thumb shifts, moving to brush against his. And as her legs move a little, she may or may not bump her foot against his. Unintentionally, of course.]
You should find a reason to do that dance of yours for them. The one where you look like a giraffe?
There is a decided lack of greenery in the desert, yes.
[ He pauses, scrolling through the rolodex of all the strange and wonderful creatures he'd seen and met over the years, thinks about the closest things that could come to giraffes in a desert and decides — ]
I think they'd only be a little grumpy out here, but they'd get on with the horses. And the little flower mantisaurs! They're a friendly lot.
[ And don't think he hasn't noticed that bump of her foot. He bumps back, but only because he thinks its some kind of tease regarding his dancing. ]
Oi! [ A huffed admonishment. ] I do not look like a giraffe. It's a perfectly respectable — downright fashionable, actually — dance move, and I'll have you know it was all the rage in 3340 Legansalia.
[She easily suggests, as if it's actually a possibility. It isn't, of course, and they're both aware of it. But still, it's a nice thought. So nice that she feels her cheeks flushing a bit as she's embarrassed by the disappointment of his not being able to take her. She covers that up by nudging her foot against his again, this time in a brush that has her foot lingering right up against his. ]
I know you can dance, Doctor. You showed me in Braccia, remember?
[Back when they had pretended to be married the first time. It's almost funny to her how that had felt like simply playing at something. This time around though, it feels so real that it's easy to forget they're still just the Doctor and Clara.]
Oh, yes. [ Also said like they've got all of the time (and space) in the world to go on their endless adventures. It's almost convincing enough to be believable, in fact. Sometimes, when the Doctor really puts his mind to it, he can believe the lies he tells like they're real. ] There's plenty of places we haven't seen yet, plenty of things to do —
[ Oh. The feeling of her foot pressed in next to his shouldn't incite any sort of emotional response, and yet it leaves him half-wanting to fidget or flap away if he thinks too hard about it. ]
I am not pouting. [ He huffs again, but it lacks any bite. Especially when he rolls a little closer to her, like he might take her dancing right here, right now, under this bedsheet-tent they've created. ] I did, didn't I? And we were brilliant.
[She points out in a whisper, scooting so they're closer together still. Their hands are joined and her other hand rests against his waist, just like they're slow dancing once again. Which is silly, of course, because they can't slow dance while laying in bed. So her fingers press against him a few times before slipping away, palm pressing down against the bed.
But then she thinks better of it and shyly puts her hand back, a gesture very unlike her typical forward nature. And even more unlike herself, she starts to sing. When you're feeling nervous and afraid, is there anything better to sing than a little Duran Duran?
It's absolutely ridiculous to be singing this particular song while discussing slow dancing. But something about singing about being lost and found and hungry like the wolf to the cadence of a slow song they could actually dance to feels exactly like the sort of language that is secretly theirs. It's so ridiculous, it just feels right.
She had said back when she first sang this out loud, on the soviet sub in 1983, that life wasn't a Disney movie. That singing wouldn't make things better. And maybe it doesn't now. But all the weight she's been carrying since Christmas seems to be gone completely now. Hidden away in their private little world, she's lost in his orbit while she's kept safe being in the center of his gravity.]
[ When Clara starts to sing in that perfectly imperfect way of hers, it's soft and sweet and reminiscent of the soviet sub they'd been on. Facing down Skaldak and deactivating those missiles ... the whole adventure feels like years and years ago. Time, of course, has always been a little bit funny for the Doctor, but it had always been his choice too. He could always pick the when and the where to go, and he could go back if he didn't like it anymore. It was always Next Wednesday if he wanted it to be. But it could be last Wednesday too.
But his life spent on the Ximilia ... it's the first time in a long, long time when he'd gone through it all, every minute experienced, every second in one straight line without a hitch.
He closes his eyes while she sings, his hand still linked with hers, mouth curved into a small smile. Like he's committing this particular version of the song to memory, letting the sound of Clara's voice sear itself onto his hearts — because these things don't last forever, not even for a time lord with a spaceship, but the Doctor never forgets a single second.
[Eventually her singing trails off into just humming, until their foreheads are pressed together and their noses are brushing against one another. She can feel his breath warm against her, and knows it would be so easy to kiss him. And she very nearly does, up until she realizes this isn't the right time.
She's rushed so many things. She can't rush this. Not with him. Panic at the thought of her ruining whatever this is between them fills her and she abruptly stops humming, pulling back and causing the blankets to tug down around them so they're back out in the open once again.]
We should -
[She can't think of a single thing they should be doing. But she's definitely flailing, fingers knitting together in anxiety. It's with a self-conscious laugh that she pulls herself out of bed and over toward her notebook. If she opens it up and looks at it hard enough, maybe he'll believe she has something very important to tend to.
And maybe if she lies to herself a bit more, she'll believe there's absolutely nothing between them for her to be nervous about.]
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No, she definitely didn't think this one through.
But she can't turn back now. Brave heart, Clara. Move forward, one foot in front of the other. Her smile doesn't fade in warmth but does become a little self-conscious as she gives a light shake of her head.]
No. You're fine, Doctor.
[She can insist on that much at least. Even if she is becoming very aware of the fact her heart is already beating faster and this is definitely a situation that can become very not okay in a blink of an eye.]
The corset's on the bed. If you don't mind grabbing it?
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It's certainly a bit more complicated than I anticipated.
[ What with all the strips of bone and the lacing and all the little button holes. And the Doctor is a clever man, make no mistake, but he suddenly feels as though he's a little out of his element. Not that he won't give this the ol' college try, as they say. Aside from clever, the Doctor is also impossibly stubborn, and his ego added to the mix means he simply won't admit defeat.
He clears his throat as he comes back over to where Clara is, gesturing towards the standing mirror. ]
Right. It's all under control, eh?
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[She rapid fires off the question about whether everything is under control the second he's finished speaking. It's not that she doesn't trust him to do this, because she wouldn't have insisted on him doing it if she didn't. It's that she is acutely aware of how close to toeing the line this is. If she was showing any little bit more, the line he had drawn in the sand would be completely blurred.
And maybe on some levels, that line has already started to be blurred. The kiss in their shared dreams and that kiss beneath the mistletoe...
Well.
She already has goosebumps, and they're only standing beside one another in front of the mirror. So yeah, maybe a little tease will help make her feel more in control of the situation.]
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[ Please. As though the Doctor would ever admit to the situation being anything other than fully under control. Even when he's got the corset in both hands, flipping it one way or another before he finally determines the 'right' side, he's still very sure that everything is perfectly under control. ]
So I think that this side here — well, it'll have to go around you, eh? Like — [ Oh, he'll just have to step up and do it, right? He moves to stand behind her, guiding one end of the corset over her chest so by the end of it, he's got his arms around her. And it's completely normal, this level of closeness; they've ... been close before, after all, hugs and linked hands are an almost daily occurrence, this really shouldn't be strange.
He swallows. ] There. If you could hold that in place, I could figure out the back bit.
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If you can tightly tie a shoe, you can lace a corset. At least, that's what Jane always has told me.
[The words are a distraction for the both of them, idle chatter meant to try and break through the mounting tension. It's a bit of a funny thing to her, that they can hug and hold hands and stay pressed close every day. But this definitely has a different feeling to it than all that. And it's not unwelcome at all.]
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[ Very, you know, under control. Because that is apparently the theme that they're going with today, and the Doctor is going to concentrate on that to keep from thinking of other things and getting all into his own head about it (things that are not quite unlike what Clara might be considering, herself), which only leads to flapping his hands and rushing out of the room in a flurry of limbs.
The chatter helps, though.
While she secures the front part of her corset, the Doctor is occupied with the lacing itself from behind. And his hands are perhaps surprisingly-unsurprisingly deft with the ribbon and the series of eyelets, each slide of the lead finding its appropriate place until a criss-crossing pattern starts to fasten the whole piece together. ]
Ah. [ Try as he might however, looking at the whole thing in a practical manner isn't as effective as it usually is. He's close enough that he can smell the clean scent of her shampoo, and feel the heat radiating off of her bare skin — surely just a side effect of the blistering temperatures here, though. Yes. Anyway — ] How does it feel? All right? Too tight? Not tight enough?
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It's tight, but it could be tighter.
[Done securing the front of the corset, she glances up into the mirror to watch their reflection. There's something about the look of him pressed in close behind her, seeing her in this state of undress, helping her with something innocently intimate that makes her blush.
She's aware of each and every movement of his hand, and swears she can feel his breath warm on the back of her neck. Her each and every little movement is calculated to not suggest attraction, to keep this as calm as possible. Her eyes are wide as she watches him work through the reflection, the softest sigh escaping her whenever he obliges with her request.]
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Better?
[ Yes. At this point, it's undeniable, the way he can feel each breath she inhales and releases, straining against the fabric meant to keep her figure rather set. He, too, looks over at their reflections in the mirror — just for a second — but it's a second long enough to have him meeting her eyes, and then immediately feeling ridiculous, and looking away. Almost — shy.
Corsets are funny things though, aren't they, something he doesn't think he'll ever understand, but there is perhaps some ... sort of appeal to it. Aesthetically speaking, that is.
Right. ]
After all, you're going to want to be able to breathe with it on.
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It's maddening.]
You make everything better.
[She answers his question, giving a nod of her head. There's a test of her breathing, slow and steady breaths. It's tight, but not impossible to breathe in. There isn't any thought given to the fact her words hold a memory for her, one that he likely hasn't experienced yet. Of course there's another layer of meaning to them, and he couldn't possibly know how much she needs and appreciates his focusing on her for this mission.
He makes everything better without even trying. Whether it's fixing her corset or making her heart feel full when she otherwise feels like she's sinking into darkness. He's always there for her.]
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Well. [ It's said softly, lightly. (So much for silly, then.) ] That's what I do.
[ He pats the bow as though to give it his final blessing, then reaches up to squeeze her arm gently. ]
And now, I believe you're set.
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Any issues there might have been with their varying timelines don't seem to be so pressing now. They've come together over the course of the months here where things are different than they were in her timeline, when they only traveled together on Wednesdays and whenever she gave him permission to come get her. here they have to go through time the long way, each day spent together more and more time to deepen their bond.
Things feel different now than they had before his regeneration on Trenzalore. But the trick is figuring out what to do with that feeling.]
Seems like.
[She offers their reflection one more glance before she turns to face him, still remaining firmly planted in his orbit. There isn't any hurry to move away and slip a dress on. She's happy right where she's at, just for a bit longer.
Her eyes glance up to his face, and she's reminded very much of that kiss they shared beneath the mistletoe as she studies him closely. That doesn't do anything but make the blush spread across the rest of her body, making her flushed and painfully shy for the first time in forever.]
Will you be here tonight?
[He has a habit of wandering and doing his own thing, but she hopes he'll find his way back here to her.]
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[ The Doctor is, as he has a penchant to do, rambling yet again. It isn't quite the nerves this time, but then there's the way she's looking up at him now, eyes practically boring into hers. And no, he doesn't look away either, the whole room around them floating away.
He clears his throat, properly seeing her, and touches her cheek. It's light and could be construed as playful even — in certain circumstances. But his expression softens and he shakes his head. ]
But I can be here tonight if you'd like. Suppose it's a husband's duty, eh? [ He smiles then, with the barest glint of mischief. ] Plenty we could explore later anyway.
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Typically this would be where she attempts to fluster him by saying something ridiculous like There's plenty we can explore here in bed too. But things have shifted between them to not feel like she needs to do that. Not when she's feeling a bit of hope, happiness warming her heart until she's unable to keep the joy off her face.]
We can head to the mines tomorrow night. Just the two of us.
[But tonight he's hers, and she has every intention of filling the time with whispered conversation and laughter beneath the blankets in bed. Her hand reaches up, fingers curling around his wrist. Her thumb softly works along his pulse point, feeling his double heartbeat. Is this closeness effecting him as much as it is her?]
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[ Not that whatever it is she's got planned for them tonight might be any less fun. It'll be a different sort of fun. And it is. Different, that is. Something's ... shifted. It doesn't feel awful; it's actually really rather the opposite, and it's got him feeling just a bit nervous, but a bit excited, but mostly he's trying not to think of it at all. He doesn't want to think about that horrid conversation they'd had some months ago, and the way he'd put that look of disappointment into her expression. He doesn't want to think of how afraid he'd been that he'd gone and wrecked their whole friendship, that he'd hurt her and driven her away from him ... even if that couldn't really be possible knowing what little he knows of his future self.
And he doesn't want to think of how selfish he's being right now, or how much more selfish he can be if he lets himself. Which, really, is good because the Doctor takes pride in being rather practiced in the art of distraction.
Even when Clara's pressing her thumb against his pulse, which is only serving to make his hearts beat just a tick faster.
The Doctor swallows. ]
Well. Yes, yes, I can't wait.
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It's hours and hours later that night, after he's back from his exploring and she's exhausted after her first long shift downstairs in the saloon. He's helped her remove her dress and corset, and they've found their way dressed down and in bed. They're caught staring at one another again, only this time they're beneath the covers in the small bed, curled up on their sides. They've pulled them up over their heads and are using a scrap of wood that she's carved to have the charter symbol for light magic that Sabriel taught her. It's resting on the bed between them, allowing them to see one another. They've just previously been discussing her studying magic and the conversation's fallen to the wayside, leaving them silently looking at one another. She doesn't even realize they've also been holding hands until she feels the brush of his thumb against her finger, causing her fingers to curl further inward against his.
Slowly, the corners of her mouth tug upward into a smile. These moments with shared whispers and longing looks mean a great deal to her. More than he likely will ever know. ]
Do you remember your anti-gravity motorbike? I wish we had one here with us. Can you imagine the look on everyone's faces as we raced up the side of the mountain?
[She giggles, smile turning into more of an amused smirk. But she never looks away. Not even when she knows she really should. But it's not as if he's looking away either. So there's no harm in this, in soft words spoken and hands being held. It's just the way things are between them now.]
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[ And said dusty heap of clothing is now not-so-carefully draped across the backs of chairs and on top of dressers, and stuffed into drawers.
All in all, the evening is turning out to be a delightful one, even without the usual hustle and bustle of an adventure or a life-threatening invasion, or something trying to chase them or eat them or end the entire cosmos. He wonders if this is what a normal human life is like, all those bits he'd been too impatient to stick around for, when he'd kick up a fuss and huffily make his way back into the TARDIS for a kip to some different era in a different galaxy, just because he could.
It's the sort of calmness that they haven't really had the time for even on the station, where things always felt a little more ... cramped. Closely tucked in with their fellow crewmates, there was always the chance that someone would need something, or someone would run into someone else, and three very dangerous glowing orbs were housed in the wing the next hall over.
He's still holding her hand in his, thumb gently sketching light haphazard circles over her skin as he thinks about all the other things that might be out of place in a world like this one. ]
I'll bet they've never seen a giraffe here.
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Probably for the best. I don't think giraffes would do well with all the sand.
[Not that she does much better. It feels like they're always covered in a thin layer of dirt and sand, and no amount of cleaning she does helps keep it tame. Not that it matters much, since this isn't really their home. But it's been easy for her to get lost in the idea of being his wife, of playing the part. Of living together like this, something sweet and quiet and absolutely perfect.
Her thumb shifts, moving to brush against his. And as her legs move a little, she may or may not bump her foot against his. Unintentionally, of course.]
You should find a reason to do that dance of yours for them. The one where you look like a giraffe?
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[ He pauses, scrolling through the rolodex of all the strange and wonderful creatures he'd seen and met over the years, thinks about the closest things that could come to giraffes in a desert and decides — ]
I think they'd only be a little grumpy out here, but they'd get on with the horses. And the little flower mantisaurs! They're a friendly lot.
[ And don't think he hasn't noticed that bump of her foot. He bumps back, but only because he thinks its some kind of tease regarding his dancing. ]
Oi! [ A huffed admonishment. ] I do not look like a giraffe. It's a perfectly respectable — downright fashionable, actually — dance move, and I'll have you know it was all the rage in 3340 Legansalia.
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[She easily suggests, as if it's actually a possibility. It isn't, of course, and they're both aware of it. But still, it's a nice thought. So nice that she feels her cheeks flushing a bit as she's embarrassed by the disappointment of his not being able to take her. She covers that up by nudging her foot against his again, this time in a brush that has her foot lingering right up against his. ]
I know you can dance, Doctor. You showed me in Braccia, remember?
[Back when they had pretended to be married the first time. It's almost funny to her how that had felt like simply playing at something. This time around though, it feels so real that it's easy to forget they're still just the Doctor and Clara.]
So there's no reason to pout.
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[ Oh. The feeling of her foot pressed in next to his shouldn't incite any sort of emotional response, and yet it leaves him half-wanting to fidget or flap away if he thinks too hard about it. ]
I am not pouting. [ He huffs again, but it lacks any bite. Especially when he rolls a little closer to her, like he might take her dancing right here, right now, under this bedsheet-tent they've created. ] I did, didn't I? And we were brilliant.
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[She points out in a whisper, scooting so they're closer together still. Their hands are joined and her other hand rests against his waist, just like they're slow dancing once again. Which is silly, of course, because they can't slow dance while laying in bed. So her fingers press against him a few times before slipping away, palm pressing down against the bed.
But then she thinks better of it and shyly puts her hand back, a gesture very unlike her typical forward nature. And even more unlike herself, she starts to sing. When you're feeling nervous and afraid, is there anything better to sing than a little Duran Duran?
It's absolutely ridiculous to be singing this particular song while discussing slow dancing. But something about singing about being lost and found and hungry like the wolf to the cadence of a slow song they could actually dance to feels exactly like the sort of language that is secretly theirs. It's so ridiculous, it just feels right.
She had said back when she first sang this out loud, on the soviet sub in 1983, that life wasn't a Disney movie. That singing wouldn't make things better. And maybe it doesn't now. But all the weight she's been carrying since Christmas seems to be gone completely now. Hidden away in their private little world, she's lost in his orbit while she's kept safe being in the center of his gravity.]
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[ When Clara starts to sing in that perfectly imperfect way of hers, it's soft and sweet and reminiscent of the soviet sub they'd been on. Facing down Skaldak and deactivating those missiles ... the whole adventure feels like years and years ago. Time, of course, has always been a little bit funny for the Doctor, but it had always been his choice too. He could always pick the when and the where to go, and he could go back if he didn't like it anymore. It was always Next Wednesday if he wanted it to be. But it could be last Wednesday too.
But his life spent on the Ximilia ... it's the first time in a long, long time when he'd gone through it all, every minute experienced, every second in one straight line without a hitch.
He closes his eyes while she sings, his hand still linked with hers, mouth curved into a small smile. Like he's committing this particular version of the song to memory, letting the sound of Clara's voice sear itself onto his hearts — because these things don't last forever, not even for a time lord with a spaceship, but the Doctor never forgets a single second.
And he certainly won't forget this. ]
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She's rushed so many things. She can't rush this. Not with him. Panic at the thought of her ruining whatever this is between them fills her and she abruptly stops humming, pulling back and causing the blankets to tug down around them so they're back out in the open once again.]
We should -
[She can't think of a single thing they should be doing. But she's definitely flailing, fingers knitting together in anxiety. It's with a self-conscious laugh that she pulls herself out of bed and over toward her notebook. If she opens it up and looks at it hard enough, maybe he'll believe she has something very important to tend to.
And maybe if she lies to herself a bit more, she'll believe there's absolutely nothing between them for her to be nervous about.]